This Gives New Meaning to "Beach Toys"

(This post is probably not safe for work.  Consider yourself warned.)

As a resident of a beach community on the Eastern Shore, I realize that tourism is a huge part of our states revenue, and that without the lovely tourists, the local economy would tank even worse than it already has.  I personally have a love-hate relationship with tourists; they are noisy, add to the traffic, and make grocery shopping a hassle; but they are also provide much needed revenue for our economy, and we wouldn't have so many entertainment options to choose from without them.  I mean what other areas have multiple water parks within a 15 mile radius, really?

I live close to Ocean City, Maryland, and tend to frequent the Maryland beaches more than the Delaware beaches.  I have, however been to Rehoboth Beach's boardwalk and it was really nice.  

Rehoboth has three different beaches: a "family" beach; a "gay" beach (no judgement here); and a "nude"  beach.  None of which are marked.  It's a huge potluck and if you find the beach you are looking for, you are doing pretty good- and if you don't, you may find yourself paying for your child's future therapy sessions when she stumbles upon a scene not unlike the "chica" one in the movie, EuroTrip. 

I heard on the radio the other day about the top items found on Rehoboth Beach.  The number one item is not what you would have expected....


are you ready?


..............................................

(surprisingly, it's not used condoms)


Sex Toys


Srsly.

I mean, grossness aside of actually FINDING somebody else's personal items (very nasty), like, sand? EW.  NOT SEXY, people.  A moonlit (or candlelit) beach might certainly be romantic, but sand in my personal area?  Seriously Not Cool.


Also, what kind of people leave that stuff on the beach?  I understand if you don't want to take it home with you because of where you live/who you live with (I mean, hey, it's your life not mine, who am I to judge), but what is wrong with trash cans?

And, hey, those things are expensive...who has that kind of money to waste, just leaving the willies all willy-nilly on the beach? 


God forbid some innocent person walking their dog stumbles upon a personal appendage and decides to use it as a chew toy. Or brings it to some kids to play "fetch" with.  

Srsly, people, be responsible and dispose of unwanted items at the beach properly.  Don't be responsible for someone else's child's therapy sessions.

I personally find this bizarrely hilarious.  The stuff that enters your head, that never gets out, I tell you.  Maybe those "super moms" are above laughing at random crazy stuff like this, but, I'm an Only Average Mom, and I can't help but giggle.

And you know that you did too.



 

Just Plodding Along

Warning: today's post is not humorous at all.

A few weeks ago, I went to the doctors and had some blood work done.  The results came in, and I have a couple health problems that are not life threatening at this point, but I needed to make some lifestyle changes so that they will hopefully self correct.  One of these changes is that I must exercise for at least an hour a day.  

Now, since it's summer, I do tend to swim a lot, but apparently that isn't enough to make my body decide to do what it needs to do, so I do my best to run/powerwalk each night.

A couple of nights ago, it rained during my outing, and I didn't let it stop me.  I had to just keep going, putting one foot in front of the other, to get it done.  No matter how strong the rainstorm, or what was lying dead along side the road, I can't let it stop me.  Or I could die.  Sorry to be so dramatic.

While I was jogging, it dawned on me that this is how I approach life.  I just keep getting up every day, doing what needs to be done, filling the roles that no one else wants to have, and I don't let anything stop me.  Even when it breaks my spirit, what must be done gets done.  

That's what I get for being the "strong one."

Moodiness aside, I am thankful that I have the opportunity to stay home with my babies, and to serve my community in the small ways that I do.  I am thankful for all my friends and that I have two healthy and beautiful daughters because things could be much, much worse for me.

So off I go now, to just plod along, hoping for something to inspire me.  Maybe an above average mom could be cheerful all the time, but I am truly an Only Average Mom.

Giraffe Tongues Really Are Black, and They Are Slimy Too

I love the State fair. 

It was like 103 degrees the night we went, but it was still totally awesome.  There was a trailer for Pampers, where they just handed out handfulls of free diapers (win!), lots of freebie raffles, and the Geico guys were total douchebags. Just sayin'.
 
The Crocs booth was awesome- they gave Becka a little toy that she calls "Frog" and I call "Crocman".  If I ever go back to work, I am totally stealing Crocman and putting him on my desk.  He is that awesome.

Crockman and the Ketchup Covered Baby

(Sounds kind of like a comic book from the 70's doesn't it?)

We get something to eat, and check out all the animals, and hit up the crafting tent (which is my favorite part of the fair, I love to see what-all everyone has made) and I see this:

Fight Like a Girl!

There was a whole table for Breast Cancer awareness-themed flower arrangements, but this was my favorite.  I took a picture with my camera and send it to my mom (for those of you who don't know, my mom has Stage IIA Breast Cancer.  I'll post more on that another day).

Finally we make our way back around to the front entrance again, and head over to the petting zoo/pony ride tent.  That is when I saw this:

I know the picture is dark, but it was getting late.

Oh, you know I HAD to go see him, and Becka was all "giraffe!" so we went in the tent.  It was so crowded, but we managed to get close enough to see that there was a lady selling carrots to feed the animals in the tent.  So I buy some, thinking that Becka would like to try to feed him, and yeah, NO.  Since I didn't want to wast my $1 worth of carrots, and hey, how many times in your life do you get to say that you fed a giraffe so I totally did.  Apparently, he liked me, and I was licked by a giraffe.

 See?  Black tongue.

Me, getting licked by the giraffe, after feeding him a carrot.

So all in all, the fair was pretty cool, and we didn't spend a ton of money, which was a good thing.  And hey, I got licked by a giraffe.  That doesn't happen every day. At least not to an Only Average Mom.

About Me

(Updated February 2013)

Hi, I'm Jamie.  I am a stay home mom for two wonderful girls, and newly the wife of a wonderful husband.  I am a Girl Scout leader for a large troop in rural Delaware.  I am a volunteer at two local churches.  I tried to be a PTO mom but the meetings always conflict with something else.  In other words, I'm Only Average. 

I started this blog to reach out to friends and family, and talk about my daily life, and my blog has grown, and become so much more.  

I love to shop, enjoy couponing, and love to feel beautiful.  My blog reflects these loves, as well as snippets from my average daily life.  Sometimes I'm funny on purpose.  Sometimes, I'm funny on accident.  

I love trying new things, and I am very opinionated- my big mouth gets me in more trouble than I sometimes care to admit.  I am always looking for something new to obsess about, and I love to share my thoughts on whatever the flavor of the moment is.  I will never accept money for my opinion, and will never give a positive review just because I am asked to.  All thoughts expressed on my blog are my true and honest opinions; however, if I have something negative to say, I always try to give suggestions on how to improve it!

If you are a vendor and are interested in having me review your product or would like to sponsor a give away, please feel free to contact me via email.  I would love to hear from you!